You can’t say yes to the world…
That’s what my friend Michelle said to me recently. I grabbed a pencil and took notes as she explained why.
Turns out, Michelle had a close brush with death recently. That’s right — she was diagnosed with COVID-19.
She found herself in a hospital bed in Milwaukee, sicker than ever before. Her heart was racing, she says, and her kidneys were on the verge of shutting down. Fortunately, it wasn’t her time to leave us. “I wasn’t ready for God, and God wasn’t ready for me,” she says.
Michelle’s near death experience forced her to come to grips with things she had been avoiding. Looking back, she now realizes she had not been living fully. “I think I have awakened a spirit that was stagnant,” she says. “It made my realize I am my own problem. I was trying to please everyone.”
After her awakening, Michelle began making bold moves. She started by ending a toxic relationship she had been in for more than 12 years.
“He was a very needy person, and I felt smothered by him. I didn’t want to break off the relationship because I knew it was going to hurt his feelings, and because I had been hurt so many times. I didn’t want to be that person,” says Michelle. Yet she found a way to end it — with enough finesse that they are still friends to this day. “I feel good about my decision,” she says.
Next, Michelle had a frank conversation with her 32-year-old son about how uncertain life is. “We take every day for granted,” she told him. “We act like we’re going to be here forever. Unfortunately, that’s not the case.”
I love talking to Michelle, .
Days after our conversation, I could still hear her voice in my head. “You can’t say yes to the world.”
Instead of trying to please the world, we need to say no more often. We need to get quiet and listen to that inner voice. That’s exactly what I plan to do.
Michelle says reading the book, Return To Love: Reflecting on a Course of Miracles, helped her as she reflected on how she would like to live differently.
“Many of us know in our hearts that we never really grew up,” says author Marianne Williamson in Return to Love. “The problem is we’re terrified. We’re just afraid, period. We’re afraid this isn’t the right relationship, or we’re afraid it is. We’re afraid they won’t like us or we’re afraid they will. We’re afraid of failure and we’re afraid of success. We’re afraid of dying young and we’re afraid of growing old. We are more afraid of life than we are of death.”
What are you afraid of, ? How long have you been coping with fear? When do you plan to confront it?
Michelle’s advice for those who wish to break free is simple. “Listen to your intuition and don’t feel guilty about your decision.”
This summer Michelle plans to travel to Puerto Rico for the first time; it’s been on her wish list for years, and she’s finally going to make it happen. The purpose of her trip? “Pleasure,” she says with a smile. “I don’t need to explain myself.”
I like that answer. You don’t need to explain yourself either, . May you find the courage to find and to free yourself.
Your ancestors will be there to support you.
Blessings
James Weeks
Author, Meditations Across The King’s River
P.S. Still available for spiritual readings.
P.P.S Signed copies of my book are available.